The Elf and the cuddly pig

Once upon a time, Etwas the Elf was running through the forests of green grass, under the canopies of clover and around the stems of tall flowers when she came upon a tiny pink hog rolling in warm mud.

"Howdy, Mr. Pig!" said Etwas.

"Sprouch!" answered the pig.

"Watcha doin'?"

"Sprouch!" answered the pig.

Etwas, looking for more conversation leapt onto the hog's flank.

"Sprouch!" protested the pig.

Etwas sidled around to the pig's rear and yanked his tail.  The twisty tail pulled straight and recoiled and sprung free and Etwas was thrust by the bounce into the air and landed on her bottom in the mud.

"OK," she said, lying down to dry in the sun on the pigs rising and sinking chest.  "Lazy's alright."

And ever since then, pigs are to Etwas like butterflies for when you want to stay still.